I Graduated From Law School and All I Got Was This Lousy BAR Examination.

I graduated a week ago from Boalt Hall School of Law. It was a pretty quick turnaround from the end of finals, to graduation, and now . . . gasp . . . studying for the California BAR Examination.

Rather than take you through an excruciating blow-by-blow recounting of the festivities, here are a few observations and highlights that I think capture the weekend:

1. Graduation gown does add 15 lbs.


2. Failed to consider that 3L year also adds 15 lbs.


3. Not surprised one bit when, after stepping foot in Muir Woods for three minutes, my father said, "So, it's a forest."


4. Mad that I didn't come up with the punchline in #3 before my dad.


5. Was incorrect in believing there would be a lack of parking on graduation day.


6. Was correct in anticipating that my dad would complain that my car was "dirty" even after spending an hour and a half detailing it before I went to the airport. Note to self: clean dirt INSIDE the crevices of the trunk door.


7. Amused that the "Viagara is for men with ugly wives" joke is even funnier in Urdu.


8. Mystified as to why Trader Joe's puts in small print on the side of a cheesecake carton "Thaw before serviing" but insists on putting in huge, all-capital letters on the front of the box, "KEEP FROZEN." Not sure why they don't just write "THAW BEFORE SERVING" on the front because that presumes that we're going to freeze the damn thing and then actually remember to thaw it out before company arrives.


9. Was amazed to have a great breakfast at the Marriot in Walnut Creek.


10. No accidental homicides and only one intent-to-kill homicide.